Monday, July 12, 2010

Ochocinco

The life of the unemployed is not exactly one that can be described by the word "full." On the contrary, words like "without," "empty," or "devoid" are far more appropriate. As in "without" meaningful employment, "empty" wallet, or "devoid" of activity. However, there is one instance where the word "full" is perfectly used in regards to the unemployed individual's life. That is when it is used to describe how "full' of time for bad television it is.

This past Sunday on VH1, NFL star and Dancing with the Stars alum, Chad Ochocinco's new dating reality show Ochocinco: The Ultimate Catch premiered. The show opened with Mr. Ochocinco sorting through an appropriately numbered 85 female contestants by having the women participate in stretching and drills.

Not your everyday ordinary drills.

Oh, no.

There were drills such as the end zone dance drill and the face to face trash talking drill. The former focused on one contestant who claimed to "keep it classy" by calling another contestant fat and telling her to go to the gym.Despite, Ochocinco's new sporty twist on dating reality shows which included a tournament style elimination bracket and ranking system, what struck me the most about the latest incarnation of VH1 dating reality is the lengths women will go in order to "find" love.

It is in part due to the lengths women will go for love, that dating shows have always held a certain amount of allure for me. If I am going to be perfectly honest, I think that besides the obvious train wreck viewing that goes hand in hand with dating shows, a part of their special powers over me lies in my secret desire to participate in one. I often wonder if I had been a contestant on a dating show featuring my husband how things may have turned out differently.
But then again most of us have endured some kind of competition and humiliation for love at least once in our lifetimes.

I definitely had my share of humiliation and competition when I began pursuing him five years ago.You see , when I first met my husband we lived in a world very different from the one we now occupy. A world of late nights and many options, in both company and drink. I spotted my husband a room away while talking to my "friend" at the time. He had visible tattoos, was wearing a tie, which by the way if you were looking for a boyfriend in 2005 was a great marker of coolness in the way skinny jeans might be today, and had a smile that promised me problems.
But I said to my "friend" anyway, "That guy is cute."

With that, away she flew across the room to him and there began our love triangle.
Six months of backstabbing, jealousy inducing date, failed attempts at ignoring one another, failed attempts at reconciling with exes, a hospital stay, a new job, and an engagement ring later we got married in September of 2005, officially crowning me as winner. (Of what,? I am still not quite sure.)
In a way my dream of being on a VH1 reality show was answered by the drama filled competition I fought my way through to end up becoming Mrs. Matty B. I wonder at times if there had been no competition would there have been a marriage. Competition does strange things to people but so does love.

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